How to Use EFT Tapping for Heartbreak

Updated: Aug 31

Are you feeling broken-hearted? Feeling the love pain? Try this quick fix technique EFT Tapping for Heartbreak and Love Pain.


Overcome Heartbreak with EFT Tapping & Switchwords


One of the biggest problems my clients deal with is the heartbreak and pain caused by a relationship break-up. Ending a relationship with someone that you hoped would be ‘the one’ can be absolutely devastating, leaving you feeling wounded, confused and anxious. Splitting up is very often the root cause of why people become depressed and fear they will never have a loving relationship.

Heartbreak can be so fierce, tearing apart your ability to deal with normal daily life and may cause you to be scared to ask what the future will hold for you. Will you ever be truly loved? Can you ever return to normal life again? If you’ve been betrayed or made a fool of the anger can rip you apart. Even worse, if you blame yourself for the split, the guilt and remorse can make your very soul ache.


Heartbreak is a Lonely Place


Others can easily forget how devastating love pain can be. Your relationship didn’t work out – so what? ‘Onwards and upward,’ they say. Plenty more fish in the sea. Oh, but if only it were that easy. Break-ups are a fact of life, albeit an often earth-shattering one. Whilst time is often a healer, the problem with time is that, well, it can take an awful long time. In some instances, years…


If you are in the throes of dealing with love pain, or if you want to begin clearing the remains of old heartache, meridian tapping techniques, such as EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) or TFT (Thought Field Therapy) may help you to begin to feel better faster than anything else you’ve tried.


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EFT Tapping for Heartbreak and Love Pain – How Does it Work?


These techniques involve ‘tapping’ on meridian/acupuncture points, whilst ‘tuning into’ the problem or emotion you are trying to clear. You only need to tap gently, as if you were tapping on the touch screen of your mobile phone. This Love Pain protocol is like a ‘tapping sandwich’ because you will tap the points in a specific sequence, then you will do the 9 Gamut Procedure, then you will again tap the points in the specific sequence again.


In order for you to be able to measure your progress, some sort of scale is required. My preference is to use Silvia Hartmann’s SUE scale (Subjective Units of Experience) which measure from -10 where you feel absolutely desperate, rock bottom, right up to +10 where you feel absolute bliss, total happiness, in love with the world!


What’s Your Heartbreak Number?


So, tune into your Heartbreak and Love Pain. Where are you on the scale? Write down the figure as this will give the starting point and you can observe your progress. It may take you a few goes to ‘get the hang’ of how to do EFT Tapping for Heartbreak, so it's necessary to be patient with yourself and the procedure. At the end of each full round, go within yourself to gauge where you are on the SUE scale and record the result.


Remember throughout the process to mentally tune into the emotion/feeling of ‘Love Pain.’ Say either to yourself or out loud ‘This Love Pain’ when you tap each point as a ‘Reminder Phrase’ to keep your mind focussed (or however else you want to refer to the emotional hearthbreak you are feeling.)


Familiarise yourself with the EFT Tapping Points as shown in the diagram below before practising EFT Tapping for heartbreak.



First Part – The EFT Tapping for Heartbreak Procedure


Tap each point about ten times.


Tapping Points:


Side of Hand (Karate Chop Point)

Under Nose

Eyebrow Point

Underarm Point**

Little Finger

Index Finger

Collarbone Point


** Note: The Underarm Point is on the side of the body approximately

4" down from the armpit (about where a bra strap would be).

Use all four fingers to tap on the Underarm Point.


Second Part – The 9 Gamut Procedure


This is a ‘brain-balancing’ technique involving eye movements, counting and humming, that is ‘sandwiched’ between the Meridian Tapping Procedure to provide a three part treatment.

Throughout the 9 Gamut Procedure you need to continuously tap on the Gamut Point. This is a point found on the back of the hand. To find it, make a fist and find the ‘dip’ about half an inch back from the knuckles at the base of the smallest finger and the ring finger. This ‘dip’ or depression is the point that you tap whilst continuing to keep your mind focussed on the problem or emotion. It’s important to tap this point continuously.


Also, whilst carrying out this procedure keep your head upright and steady (look straight ahead and don’t allow your head to move about, keep your head still, it’s only your eyes that move.)


Keep tapping on the Gamut Point continuously and keep your head still throughout.


Remember to focus on the heartbreak throughout this procedure.


Throughout this part keep your head still, it’s only your eyes that move:

  1. Open your eyes

  2. Close your eyes

  3. Open your eyes

  4. Look down to the left

  5. Look down to the right

  6. Roll eyes one way then the other

  7. Hum a tune (for around five seconds)

  8. Count from one to five

  9. Hum again


Third Part – Repeat the EFT Tapping for Heartbreak Procedure


Remember to keep focussing on the ‘Love Pain’ that you feel as you tap.


Tap each point about ten times.


Tapping Points:


Side of Hand (Karate Chop Point)

Under Nose

Eyebrow Point

Underarm Point

Little Finger

Index Finger

Collarbone Point


Use Switchwords and EFT Tapping for Heartbreak


As I said previously, it may take a few rounds to become au fait with the process, but keep going as you will soon find it becomes second nature. After three or four rounds, when using this process with my clients, I then introduce ‘Switchwords.’ Initially, at the end of the Meridian Tapping Love Pain rounds, I will instruct the client to use the Switchwords, and then once the client feels more in balance, I get them to concentrate only on the Switchwords as they do a Meridian Tapping round. In effect, this ‘taps in’ the benefits of the Switchword.


If you have never heard of Switchwords, they were discovered by James T. Mangan, who in his book ‘The Secret of Perfect Living,’ describes how the subconscious mind has ‘switches’, which when flipped (by a switchword) can bring about desired outcomes. Other writers, such as Shunyam Nirav, the author of Switchwords Easily Give to You Whatever You Want in Life,’ have taken hold of the baton and expanded upon the idea.


How are Switchwords used?


Switchwords can be used singularly or as a combination of words. Personally, I find them far more effective than the usual affirmations because it appears the subconscious (or indeed the conscious) mind does not hold up objections against them, in the way that I find it tends to with affirmations. If you have ever tried affirmations, such as ‘I am loved and fabulous,’ and immediately found your subconscious replying with ‘Oh really? Since when?’ then you will recognise the way you can end up playing a tug-of-war within yourself.


Switchwords can be used to sidestep this problem and glide into the subconscious with little, if any, resistance. Thus, the subconscious simply ‘accepts’ the Switchword and begins to act upon it automatically. It is in this way that the words are used to ‘switch off’ the internal resistance and ‘switch on’ the result you seek.


Meridian or EFT Tapping and Switchwords can work perfectly well as stand-alone modalities. But I find combining the two seems to increase and fast-track the results my clients want. Originally, James T. Mangan identified 100 Switchwords and each can be used for the specific result wished for. Essentially, the Switchwords represent the essence of the required result and can be spoken aloud, recited internally, chanted or even written down, as many times as you feel is needed.


Switchwords for Heartbreak and Love Pain


Rather than list all of the original Switchwords here, I suggest that you pick a couple of words from the following list, which are the ones I find most effective:


Alone – this helps you to shift the focus onto yourself, enabling you to take active steps to nurture and heal yourself.


Around – this helps you to gain a more balanced perspective.


Be – achieve a sense of peace, chase away loneliness.


Cancel – this helps dispel anxiety, negative thoughts and unwanted situations.


Change – use this word to rid yourself of emotional pain.


Charm – the word to use to help you manifest your heart’s desire.


Crystal – a great Switchword to enable you to shed light on a situation and become more clairvoyant, able to see the future.


Cut – the go-to word to rid yourself of toxic relationships, enabling you to sever ties where needed.


Dedicate – use this to stop hanging onto a situation or person and free yourself to move on.


Divine – this increases personal ability and opens you up to miraculous solutions and serendipitous events.


Forgive – helps to reduce anger and thoughts of revenge and lessen feelings of remorse.


Off – useful for reducing an unwanted habit and great for helping you sleep well.


Postpone – enables you to let a situation or person go.


Reverse – if you are stuck in a repetitive behaviour pattern or feel a grudge against someone, this is the word for you.


Save – if you have developed a habit for alcohol to drown your sorrows, this will help with that and any other unwelcome habits.


Together – according to James T. Mangan, this is the most important Switchword and helps you master anything, including getting your act together. It facilitates the ability to become single-minded and absolutely focussed on what you need to.


Tomorrow – stop the sorrow and reduce remorse with this word.


Add Together-Divine


Before starting the Meridian Tapping rounds, I go through the list with my client, who picks the words that most resonate (to which I always add Together-Divine) for example:


Together-Divine-Cancel-Change-Postpone


Switchwords & EFT Tapping for Heartbreak Homework


This is spoken aloud or internally as the client ‘taps’ through the EFT Tapping round. After the session, the client’s ‘homework’ is to do at least three rounds, six times a day. At the end of the day the client records how they are feeling in a private journal. This helps them chart their progress as they move from ‘Love Pain’ into a new phase of positivity.


If you are in the midst of Heartbreak, then I hope this information is helpful for you. If you decide to give Switchwords and EFT for Heartbreak a try, I would love to hear from you, so please let me know how you get on.


Kick the heartbreak to the kerb and have a fabulous day!


And if this exercise has been useful to you - please share this via social media so this information can be found by the people who need it – thank you!


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And there’s more…


As well as being a life coach and hypnotherapist, I’m also an author, and have written a book about Switchwords and the amazing effect they can have on your inner and outer world: Speak Yourself Happy: Use Switchwords to Create Your Ideal Life (Kindle Edition) – Ruthy Baker:


Learning how your attachment style affects your relationships can save you a ton of heartache. This book examines adult attachment theory and, more importantly, how to navigate relationships and find your ideal partner: Attached: Are you Anxious, Avoidant or Secure? How the science of adult attachment can help you find – and keep – love – Amir Levine & Rachel Heller:


If being in love means being in pain, this book was written for you. Leading relationship and marriage therapist Robin Norwood describes loving too much as a pattern of thoughts and behaviour, which certain women develop as a response to problems from childhood. It’s a must read if heartache is a familiar pattern in your relationships: Women Who Love Too Much – Robin Norwood:


Enjoyed this blog post? Take a peek at this: Why You Need a Journal (ruthybaker.com)


Some of the best relationships happen between partners who share similar interests and values. When you feel ready to venture out into the world again, take a look at Meet Ups and make new friends! https://www.meetup.com/


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